Thank you 2011, you were amazing!

Wow. Just wow. I usually spend the week after Christmas clearing my “To Do” list that chased me through the year, cleaning my house and digging in my heels to welcome the new year. I start by looking at the previous year and then attempt to decide what I would like to see from the coming year. I just ran across this blog entry I wrote last year going into 2011 and it brought me to my knees...

As 2011 rolls in I make this resolution. I just want to be me. I want to be me all the way. I want to do what I am kinda of doing, only way bigger and better! I want...that is, I WILL, dream bigger, work harder, run faster, push beyond the normal limits more than I already do.........I have a lot of weird crap happen in my life. Finally, I believe I am to the point I just don't care or question it anymore. I have so many incredible weird blessings too! I like to think I welcome blessing more than others too. This year it's going to rain!!!!!..........between now and then there will not be any "I wish"'s or "If only I had"'s. We will live! Live fully and deeply. Welcome 2011! I have big plans for you!

Well, holy cow. I declared it and by golly, it happened. This was one incredible year. Full, absolutely overflowing with amazing experiences. It rained. 

In 2009 my “theme” I had somehow determined for myself was “Just Keep Swimming”. I picked it up from the movie Finding Nemo. As long as I was moving, I was moving. In 2010 I found myself always thinking of those penguins from that Disney movie that shuffled their way across a continent. It was a step up I guess because instead of just moving I was actually headed somewhere. I could slap myself looking back but at that time, in those moments it’s what I had. 2009 I was pregnant with Charlotte. Pregnancy sucks for me. After she was born, I was tired. I was trying to hold it all together. We realized around that time that Abbi could be starting her family while we were teaching Charlotte to ride a bike. That gap in age has been rewarding but was also exhausting. In 2010, I struggled to even walk for the first 6 months. Tons of x-rays, MRI’s, physical therapy and injections consumed half the year after falling down the stairs and then on our icy driveway. By the second half I was able to find where I had left myself and was ready to get on with things. Going into 2011 I stood myself up, brushed off the dust and looked UP. Wow! What a difference. What I declare for 2012 is this: There was a song that really struck me when Matt and I saw the broadway musical WICKED in New York. It’s called Defying Gravity. The green witch, Elphaba, declares if she is going to living her dreams and be what she was intended to be she must defy gravity. 

Too late for second-guessing

Too late to go back to sleep

It's time to trust my instincts

Close my eyes: and leap!

I'm through accepting limits

''cause someone says they're so

Some things I cannot change

But till I try, I'll never know!

As someone told me lately:

"Ev'ryone deserves the chance to fly!"

It will be my newest theme! The whole Oprah extravaganza taught me there are no real limits. Now that I believe there is no ceiling, I want to fly above them. 

The things that top the cool or memorable list for the year for me and our family are (best things first):

-I wrote an article that was purchased by Disney and was the feature article in the March edition of Family Fun. What a fun experience.

-In March I entered my friend Kara for the final makeover episode on the Oprah Winfrey show. She was chosen and by the end of April we were in the HARPO studio in Chicago surrounded by big names drowning in opportunity and fun. It was an experience I will forever cherish and one that was life changing. I learned a lot about myself and others throughout this experience. It has set a new standard for what is possible and encouraged me that the only limits you are are ones you give yourself.

-In June, I followed a random Twitter request to meet a bunch of famous strangers at the Grand Canyon as part of an awareness road trip. I had an overwhelming feeling I should go. A photographer I admire was taking portraits of people sharing their Dreams vs Fears. I was hesitant but my girls said, “you would make us go for it so you should too”. They were right so I did. Though a chain of super weird events and against many challenges I ended up meeting up with them. It was pretty cool and I ended up in a video for TWLOHA. It became part of a special on MTV. My portrait is featured in the video but better yet my voice sharing my fear opens the video and then my dream closes it. I still have no idea why I had such an overwhelming feeling to join them. Maybe someday I will get to know....maybe not. 

-I attended a super photography convention in Las Vegas and learned so much. The rest of the year was spent putting it into practice. I feel like I grew a lot, improved and look forward to continued growth. 

-Charlotte was watching a hockey game between Ryder and Izze on the stairs. Somehow she got clipped with the stick and received her first (and hopefully last) plastic surgery. It’s healed well! 

-It must have been an “eye” year because shortly after that I ripped my own cornea. It was incredibly painful and irritating. The treatment included a bandaid applied right to my eyeball. I was so utterly impressed and amazed by the device and how well it worked that I am still in awe. I did learn an important lesson, don’t cut onions while wearing an eyeball bandage. 

-Matt spent most of the year achieving goals in areas he has wanted to pursue for years. Ryder started hockey and he has had a ball helping him learn the game and coaching his team. He accomplished a ton of work on his 1968 Camaro. In order to do so he had to learn many skills such as welding. He has had fun posting the photos and accomplishments to a blog. His goal it to finish it in 2012. 

-Abbi finished her first year of high school. It was adventurous and fun for all of us. She loved her first season of high school volleyball, loved playing soccer in quite a different format and excelled in track and field. As a freshman she ran varsity and received her first Letter in Athletics. She also got her permit. I think we were more excited than she was. What a milestone. However, it’s proven to not to be like I imagined it. As parents we have been given the opportunity to learn a new level of patience and communication skills. I am confident we will come out on the other end....I hope. She has maintained great grades and received a second Letter for Academics. 

I continued in real estate even though the market makes it very difficult. To supplement I increased the property management side of my business and built a photography business. What fun that has been. I took photos of weddings, families, newborns, sports and businesses. There is no way to even measure what I learned this year in the business and about myself. 

- Izze started at a new charter school and has enjoyed it. It’s much harder than anything she has done before but she is smart and strong and the challenge will pay off. She has many good friends. In May she tore her MCL during a soccer game so a lot of her year was recovering and getting back in the game. We were on a mission (that we continue) for several months related to stomach pain and sickness when she eats. We have some solid avenues to pursue and are confident 2012 will be much better for her. 

-Somewhere during the spring while waiting for kids in a parked car (as I frequently do) I discovered my first defining proof that age will get me in the end. I spotted a crease in my earlobe. You can hide gray hair, Botox your way out of facial wrinkles, grease yourself up, stuff your self like sausage into anti-jiggle apparatus but you can’t hide an earlobe crease or neck wrinkles. It was funny how sad it made me. I surprised myself really. The plan was to embrace the changes and war wounds and “my story” but the earlobe crease got to me. 

-I tried to really celebrate things this year. It started with Christmas 2010 and carried into about summer of 2011 before I faded. The fun things available and seasonal traditions were stacked in plenty. St. Patricks morning I dressed Charlotte and I in green and headed down to make a green breakfast. When I came downstairs I pinched Matt immediately for not having green on. Then I pinched Ryder. It was a firm love pinch but it horrified him.  After Matt left the bathroom he declared there were green stripes on his underwear. He gave me a hearty pinch and declared a refund. Ryder scolded me all the way to school and told his teacher the second we walked in the door. He was literally mad for 4 months about it. I tried to increase my steam going into fall with the “celebrations”. I ended up declaring September Apple and Caramel month. August is always the back to school whirlwind, October has Halloween, November has Thanksgiving and of course Christmas consumes December. From here forward September has a new purpose.

-I had a stretch of funny and odd experiences. A couple of shirt incidences come to mind. Don’t know why but it was both embarrassing and hysterical. The first was at Walmart. I was pushing my super heavy full basket uphill with two kids hanging off the side. It was really windy and the climb was a struggle so I was leaning forward with both hands on the basket. There was a huge gust of wind that blew my fairly snug fitting shirt up and over my head. When I tried to let go the basket would spin to the side and nearly flip because both kids were on one side. I had to work my way around, blinded, until I could free myself and hide my ladies. When I got into the car I laid my seat all the way down and just howled. When I was finished laughing I thought about the poor man that had probably been dragged there reluctantly and was waiting in the car, bored. Ha! I made his day. That started an entirely new round of laughter.  Not a week later I was handing out pizza to the kids at opening day of Micro soccer and another gust caught the same shirt and flipped it up over the ladies. I quickly pulled it down. I looked up to see a little boy right in front of me with eyes wide open. I just moved on hoping he didn’t find it worthy of a news report to anyone. It was a totally normal fitting straight t-shirt but since it was apparently possessed, I donated it to Salvation Army. I wish I could have followed it like the story of the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants. I wonder who else became a peep show because of it. 

-We were temporarily addicted to coconut oil as a family. I bought our first jar from Whole Foods while in Phoenix for a soccer tournament. It was magnificent. Everything we used it on was so much better. I rubbed it on my skin, conditioned my hair, soaked my heels, added it to eggs, cakes and even coffee. It is expensive and magical. I tried several local brands but they never cut it. We don’t  go to Phoenix between May and October because it’s hotter than the face of the sun. Because I couldn’t replenish I accidentally weaned us off. 

-Ryder and Charlotte were absolute riots this year.  A couple I can think of: We watched the movie 127 Hours.  Within 127 seconds Ryder declared he would not be cutting his own arm off. The next day we walked into his preschool and he announced loudly to everyone, “I am not going to cut my arm off when I play in the rocks”.  Another morning he said to me while the song from Flashdance was on the radio, “turn this song off. It’s making my heart feel so sad and I am going to cry. Find me a man song”. He approved when I put on a heavy metal song.  Charlotte was an amazing sleeper for the first two years of her life. Went to sleep without bargaining, slept long hours and took great naps. One night she just wouldn’t sleep at all. She wanted to watch, “Doo Doo Dora”. She stayed awake the whole next day as well. In the afternoon we concluded Izze had given her a Crystal Light lemonade water mix that had energy supplements. Yikes. She has not slept right since. She wanders around, talks in her sleep, goes to bed late and gets up early. Darn that energy drink!!! Charlotte was successfully potty trained this year but not before creating a lot of poop related memories. She delivered it by the handful, hid it, rubbed it on her lips and painted with it numerous times. I am glad going into 2012 the Poop Stories are in the past. 

-Matt and I spent a week in New York, alone. We celebrated life, love, his birthday and 17 years of marriage. We did and saw a ton. The weather was amazing and we have a treasure chest of memories.

-We experienced tragedy as well. Early in the year Matt’s cousin Andy died. He was only a few years older and died from a heart condition Matt had only be saved from literally weeks before. It was really hard on his family and they miss him terribly. Matt and his dad flew to Kentucky for the funeral. On the way they got stuck in the Atlanta airport for several days. No way in, no way out, no food and limited access to his medicines. It was very stressful but the were able to make it to the funeral and arrive safely at home. Andy had many special qualities and will be always loved.

I experienced one of the most emotional and difficult things of my life this year. My friend Kim died after a tremendous battle with cancer. She was 38, mother of 4, incredible inspiration and true friend. She lived a life that others were changed and affected by in powerful and positive way. Her way was one that was peaceful, energetic, comforting and genuine. My life is so much richer for having had her in it. I will pay it forward and feel God is leading me to do so in helping her family share the journal she wrote during her struggle. I aspire to affect people the way she did. I will do anything and everything I can to honor the person she was and the life she lived. 

On a worldly level, it was a nut house out there!

The economy, job market, debt ceiling and real estate market continue to be a mess.

Twitter and Facebook rule the social scene and have created a whole new way of “community”.

The “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” policy in the military was a constant focus.

Japan was hit with a tsunami after an earthquake that caused tremendous damage and death. A nuclear power plant was affected and continues to cause environmental issues.

Prince William married Kate Middleton. I really don’t care but the world pays a lot of attention to Royal Weddings. 

Occupy Wall Street was a movement of folks protesting the financial decision of our leaders. People everywhere camped out and tried to make their point. When we passed the “center” of it all in New York there were only a handful of folks still yelling on a sidewalk. It certainly fizzled but I do hope people were at least open to what they were trying to communicate.

The founder and mastermind behind Apple computers sleek brilliance, Steve Jobs died. His life was scrutinized after his passing. What I believe shakes out in the end is the strength and perseverance that got him to where he was. 

Smart phones are in nearly everyone’s pocket. Tablets and the ipad have climbed their way into mainstream. 

A new astrological sign was entered in although I didn’t follow it and have no idea why. 

Kim Jong the leader of North Korea died. His death has the world holding their breath. What will follow? His power was passed to his son that is believed to have the same views and beliefs as his father. 

Goodbye 2011. I have a lump in my throat letting you go. You were amazing. The only thing that encourages me forward is the amount of unknown blessing and possibility in our future. 

Keeping Daddy Alive! Woot woot!

Since the whole heart incident went down we have changed our ways! My cholesterol has always been low as has my blood pressure. They usually take my blood pressure twice because it's so low they think they messed up. Matt's was at the top of 'normal' but had an artery shut down, a 99% blockage and now has a big fat stent. He will be on medication for the rest of his life for both cholesterol and blood pressure. However, we brought 4 more beings into the world that got an equal share of both sets of our genes. Who will get the curse of the cholesterol or blood pressure...???? Even though his issue was hereditary we have transformed our families entire diet. Our offspring are going to need to be well educated and eat healthy foods for a lifetime. Well, don't we all?! My goal is for them to actually like it. The day Matt got home from the hospital I went through the cabinets and fridge. I threw out everything that was not a benefit to us. I filled a trash can with mayo, ranch, coffee creamer, ice cream...etc. I have since replaced everything with a "skinny" healthy version. Don't get me wrong, I really don't think we ate badly before but there was certainly room for improvement. For example, when we ate at Taco Bell we chose a chicken burro. Now we choose to drive on by :) I love to cook with lots of fresh whole foods and have a huge garden every year. Traveling for soccer is where we usually fail. After Matt got the stent the cardiologist told us not to go nuts but to use our basic 5th grade health education when eating. Have a salad for dinner, don't eat after 7:00, eat plenty of fruits, veggies and whole grains, eat ice cream...on your birthday. He didn't prescribe a specific diet to him just a smart one. We felt fairly aggressive was really better for everyone on a lot of fronts. I have since made better use of my bi-weekly Bountiful Basket and have a habit of reading the labels. A person in normal health shouldn't have more than 300mg of cholesterol a day, someone like Matt 200 mg. A teeny little container of Ben and Jerry's has 110 mg per serving (2 servings per container). We have quit using cheese which at first was much like giving up my arms. We have identified restaurants that have good choices for when we are busy or traveling for the kids sports. It's actually been a bit fun and challenging. Throughout the last 20 years I have dieted in some way or another a lot. I could always talk myself into or out of anything. It's different this time. We almost needed the punch in the mouth to get us fully commited to eating well, all the time. I was raised with perspective of, "Heck! You only live once! You might as well". Because of that I have had a lot of great experiences. But with food that's tricky. We also always used special occasions and holidays as excuses. After years of that you just start to say to yourself it's okay and you'll change your ways Monday. That infamous "Monday" has become one of our favorite jokes! After soccer last weekend we took the kids and Abbi's friend to a pizza place. The plan was for Matt and I share to a hearty salad and let the kids have pizza. That was a fine plan until that hot, steamy, cheesy pizza is dumped down in front of you! Poor Matt. I can eat it but shouldn't. The kids shouldn't and he can't. It was like he had just been given a bowl of brussel sprouts in lieu of a birthday cake. I shouted out, "Can I get a woot woot for keeping Daddy alive?". All the kids hollered, "woot woot!". He laughed, straightened up a bit and we all ate. Since that night anytime we are having a boring salad for dinner or choosing the "grilled chicken sandwich hold the mayo, hold the cheese, hold the fries" or the egg white omelet no cheese veggies only I shout out for a "woot woot". His near death (and didn't even know it) experience was scary. Our strength as a family and the gift of him in our lives is worth holding on tightly to. So, hold the cheese please!

Whoa! Didn't see that coming!

The events September brought into our home were defining, stupendous, magnificant, spectacular, horrible, scary and humbling.

Matt tells me one morning, "if anything even happens to me remember you will have insurance for a year, life insurance though the fire department, my retirement..." I thought it was odd that he just thought to give me a very clear and concise rundown of exactly what would happen in the event of his death. He doesn't remember our checking account number but gave me a 10 minute exact description of services. I figured he had just been to a benefits meeting or something at work. Soon after he told me that he had some chest pain while working out and made a doctors appointment. He meant like right then. He walked out the door. He wasn't sure if it was just the effects of a cold and cough or if there was something real. A friend of his, and fellow firefighter, recently had a heart attack so he was feeling nervous. He came home from the doc with instructions to see a cardiologist the following day. He went by himself and had a full set of tests run. Everything looked great. His cholesterol was at the top of the normal range, not considered high. His echocardiagram looked good and all other tests presented "normal". He continued to feel chest pain if stressing himself. They decided to do a stress test. He aced the stress test coming in 2nd only to a Marathon runner. The pain did return so they did one final "extra" test. It was a nuclear dye test. Nothing was picked up as a concern so he left. A week later he went in for a review of all the tests. The prognosis was concerning. The doc said that final test had shown a small area that may not have been getting enough blood in his heart. That was usually the result of some sort of blockage. He was scheduled for an angiogram (to look), possibly an angioplasty (to open it), and potentially a stent. At the old ripe age of 37 he was feeling very discouraged. A blockage would be the result of bad genes and untreated high cholesterol. Expect...his cholesterol numbers fit in their box. Discouraging. A few days later he went in for the procedure. About 45 minutes into it they came out to tell me that he had chronic issues. Of the three arteries bringing blood to his heart one was great, one was gone and one was blocked! WHAT! My first question was, "What do you mean gone?". Turns out that one had been blocked in the past. His body compensated by creating it's own intricate bypass system. It's something the cardiologist said takes time. He normally see's it in someone 70 years old because of the time it takes to create. So, this is not new. It means he has been in trouble since his 20's. The next question from me was regarding the 3rd artery blockage and whether it would be stented. That artery was 99% occluded (blocked). Just 1% away from failing. The process for the stent should have taken 45 minutes. Instead it took about 3 hours. He had a bizarre 'loop de loop' they had to naviagate around. Turning sharp corners with instruments, wires, stents and the like is tricky. The doctor was spectacular and got the job done. He opened everything up and placed three stents equalling roughly 40mm. He would have just gotten one but none would fit around that funny turn. He built one out of three. He also opened up an area down from that was comprimised as well. A patch of tape covered the small hole in his groin and to recovery he went. From that point forward every doctor, nurse, lab tech and custodian stopped by to say, "What! Wow! You are too young". Their concerns were genuine but that wore on him quickly. Yes! He is too young. Far too young! However, the fact it was found and fixed BEFORE he just dropped dead is a flat out miracle. How he hadn't already had a heart attack we have no idea. How all those tests showed normal results irritates me. The cardiologist said very matter of factly, "I don't know how we didn't kill you on the treadmill!" He said his case has changed his practice. His age, no warning signs, the test results in combination with such radical issues is jaw dropping. It turns out as well that the final test that showed "maybe something" is not usually a test insurance will cover. They want them to stop at the treadmill. However, it saved his life. Matt was very private about the pain, concerns and surgery. Now he is very open about it. He feels that he might just be the blessing that saves other lives. Had it not been for his friend that shared he would have never given his own pain a second thought! He was the poster child for psychological responses! He was scared, then he was mad that everyone has always said his cholesterol numbers were acceptable and now here he was getting heart surgery because of them. Confused followed and was quickly replaced with shock. He felt very fragile and "old" for a day or so and then transformation occured. He had been really quiet and mellow for like two weeks. Two days after the surgery he jumped off the couch and said, "I have to tell everyone. I have to save other people! If Pat had acted like this I would be dead!" Following that statement he spent the next 3 days on the phone. We should have bought stock in his cardiologists business. That man's phone is ringing off the hook!

Plllltttthhhh!!! (Translation: big fat raspberry)

September brought a bizarre and...dumb chain of events! We had a funky run of "funk". Weird and inconvenient things happened pretty much daily. First, the broken clock. My hubby's grandma died in April. He grew up very close to his "Mamaw" and "Papaw". He is quite sentimental and wanted a clock from her house. Growing up the sound of that clock summed up "grandma's house". Matt's dad was in Kentucky cleaning out her house and so we had him send it by UPS out to us. I arranged everything and Matt's dad and uncle packed it up and dropped it off. We learned in this process that the words THIS END UP and FRAGILE mean nothing! UPS managed to drop the 6 foot grandfather clock on its side. Not only was it damaged, it was broken in half! The amount of work this has caused me is totally unbelieveable. Their system is set up to take absolutely no fault. I have spent so much time on the phone and gathering "evidence" I feel I am now a bit of a clock expert. At this point our claim (which I had to fight for almost a month now just to be considered) is being considered. The hardest part was picking it up here in Flagstaff. It still smelled like her house but instead of being this solid remberence (on the hour, every hour) of their home and their lives, it's two box's of old wood and clock parts. It can be fixed but the senitmental value for my hubby will never be the same.

Next...the walking dead man! (this event deserves a post all of it's own)

Then just a handful of YUCK! (really it's more like a big scoop... not a handful)

I was at Fry's grocery store with Ryder and Charlotte. She is getting really heavy so I stopped in the parking lot to put her in a cart. I was standing in the "cart corral" buckling her. Ryder was standing right next to me also in the corral. I was just starting to pull the basket out when I got whacked with a cart right in the butt. It hit me right in the tailbone. I quickly turned around and saw a man getting into a red car looking at me. He had only one leg in the car and was looking right at me. He was in the space just a few feet from the corral. He was just staring at me emotionless. He had shoved his cart in while I was standing in it. I am not sure if he was intentionally trying to hit me but there was really no other outcome possible. I don't think I am hard to see, I am far from tiny. Stunned was all I felt at the time. My head was racing. This year has been a super rough one for my body. After having a baby, falling down a flight of stairs (bouncing all the way on my tailbone) and then falling down a driveway while snow blowing my pelvis and hip areas have needed extensive love. After numerous x-rays and an MRI I was diagnosed with Chronic Accute Sacroillitis. In June I had SI injections (giant needles inserted directly into my sacroilliac joints (where your hips join your tailbone) guided by a live xray and physical therapy 2-3 times a week for 6 months. This man had no idea what his little stunt could have done to me. What are the odds!? Arghh. I just moved his cart, backed out mine and walked towards the store. I looked back to see him watching me from his car. My only thought at the time was to pout out my lip and drop my head. Yep! I was full on pouting! I didn't really have it in me to be mad...yet! Later I thought of a million choice hand gestures, phrases and acts of violence I could have chosen. I still don't understand what he was thinking!

The 3rd Thursday of September was the kick-off to MOPS. It's a group of mommies all seeking community, friendship and something to prod them on in their daily lives home with preschoolers. I discovered this group when my big girls were little and I took a leave of absence from teaching. I started attending again last year after having Charlotte. I had fallen into a routine where everyday spilled into the next. I didn't have the energy to drag my kids anywhere or even get dressed. I was running a full time real estate business from home but the market had crashed so I had a lot of time on my hands. The thought of grocery shopping with these two new little ones was too much. After I was finished with the pity party for myself I looked up a new MOPS group. Funny what having two sets of kids does to you. It's often like I live two totally seperate lives at the exact same time. Anyway, I woke up excited for the MOPS kick off only to find I couldn't turn my head! Arghhh! That happens about once a year. I went anyway and tried to get as much out of it and have as much fun as I could. This was just a few days after Matt's huge scary heart incident so this neck thing was kind of the gnat on the final straw that broke the camels back. I really shouldn't have been driving with my neck like that but I was. When it was over I walked back to my car to find it had been wrecked. Hit and run! We have decent insurance but it comes with a decent deductible. So, because someone decided to leave me all their paint instead of a note we get to share a car for a week and fork up the deductible to get it fixed. The bumper is messed up as is the tailgate. So, I am super glad we have insurance because it's not going to be cheap.

While dropping off or picking up (I made so many trips that weekend I have no idea) Abbi I pulled a super stupid move! Super stupid! I was leaving a soccer field at NAU. I was turning left onto a main drag while steering with one hand. The other hand was busy! Whah! Yup...cell phone. I was trying to dial my phone while turning into an intercection (Yes, I know. Every part of me agrees). The next thing I know I am airborn and my surburban is bouncing and flying all over the place. I had managed to climb a curb with BOTH my right tires at the same time. However, I think they only jumped up and right back down. Something in Isabelle's cup holder splashed out and all over her. Whatever it was smelled bad (that will teach her not to leave yucky old crap in there). The worst part was the poor innocent old woman that happened to be on the sidewalk! She was quite upseat, I really did almost hit her. I actually looked her right in the eye before jerking my wheel and landing back down on the road. I couldn't help but laugh at the face she made. There was nothing funny about it but HOLY COW! Isabelle lectured me for the next 20 minutes and declared I was a horrible driver. Seriously, she just witnessed me hit and jump a huge curb super and nearly killed someone while using my phone. I think she is correct. Later I discovered I had taken a big chunk out of each spendy aluminum rim and ripped both tires. The tires on there were just replaced. I don't think my stupidity is covered under the warranty.


A few days later after having lunch with Matt I made a comment about how I had a weird rash on my pinky. I showed him. Little red ouchies all along the inside of my left pinky. I noticed a blister and questioned what was rubbing it. I looked over to the next finger, my ring finger. Ahhhh!!!! No!!!! My diamond was gone! It must have fallen out days before to have caused that irritation. Usually when "new crap" appears I laugh and think to myself, "bring it on!" Not that day. That day I just looked out the window on the way home and put the ring away. That ring symolizes a lot for me. It's more important to me than my actual wedding ring. For our 10th anniversary we went on a trip and renewed our vows. We got married (the first time) really young. The vows that preceeded that ring meant a lot more to me than the first round :) Someone told me once that you don't choose to be married once. You choose it everyday. That trip sort of marked a new beginning. I understood more what marriage really meant and what I was choosing. I love that ring! Not for the material factor but for what it represented to me.


I declared that the first day of Fall was going to bring a new fresh start. Only good things are in line headed our way! I am settling for nothing less.

The first day of Fall I went to pick up our tax return from our accountant. What!? A refund? We haven't had a refund in over 6 years. This one is a doosie too! Woo hoo! Can't wait to see what else is headed our way!

Karma

The idea of Karma is that all deeds are viewed as actively shaping past, present, and future experiences. I don't really believe in Karma. However, the cycle of cause and effect seemed to be actively present in my day. I felt like I didn't like I slept a wink despite being exhausted from spending the previous day at the fair. Labor Day is supposed to be one of those "relaxing" days where everyone just hangs out, sleeps in, eats fun food and doing useless things for longer than necessary. Somehow though, those plans never seem to translate out right. Abbi wanted to get to a sale that started at 7:00 so I knew sleeping in wasn't going to happen. However, after a night of muscial beds I was awakened at 6:00am by a sound I know all too well. It was a super loud, super gooey, super powerful sneeze. One of those that my first response is, "OH NO!" I rolled over and peeled my eyes open to see Ryder standing next to me with walrus boogers! Arghhh! No!!! Before I could intervene he had reached down and wiped his face on our comforter! I drug myself out of bed and headed downstairs with him. What did he want to do at 6:00am? Watch the IRON MAN DVD I had rented! In two days we have watched this movie about 200 times. I enjoyed it the first 2 times but the next 198 took me to the brink. For some reason it really struck him and he adores it! I made coffee and tried to wake up a bit. With coffee in hand Abbi and I headed to the sale at 7:00am. While there Aunt Flo decided to pay me a visit. How convenient! We ended up at the store for 3 hours! It was a great sale. Therefore, the nuts were out in full force. People were clogging the aisles, pushing baskets out of their way and just acting stupid. There was a giant line to use the dressing rooms. One lady had even resorted to squeezing herself into various things while still wearing her clothes and spinning over and over in front of a warper mirror in a corner. I found that wildly entertaining! Abbi tried on about 100 things because nothing seems to ever fit her! Welcome to my world baby, sorry. She was lucky enough to really hit the mother load of deals! The cashier we got had broken her thumb the day before and had a bandage the size of a roll of paper towels. She was really struggling to accomplish anything. She messed up my payment which required several other workers to intervene to get it corrected. I had only had coffee before leaving so I was really starving and ready to get out of there. On the way home I remembered I needed to buy a birthday present for my great neice. We raced to buy a present from a store that had huge lines at the check out. There was some sort of conflict that landed us at their store also far longer than necessary. Afterwards I raced it to my sisters house to drop it off. When I finally got home around 11:00 I walked in to find tiny little Tootsie Doodies. Apparently no one had let the dog out while I was gone! By this point I had my fill of the super fun relaxing events the Labor Day Holiday was delivering. I stomped off to the bathroom and slammed the door. Now, let me preface this next account with some family history. I have no idea how or why but every toilet seat we have in every house breaks. All of them! Even the ones in the bathrooms only small people use. My hypothesis is that "someone" is standing on them in the unsupported areas. Why? I have no idea but it has happened in the last 4 houses! Either way it seems that we procrastinate in replacing them... far longer than necessary! I plopped myself down totally annoyed that I had to clean up poop and boogers all before lunch. Wouldn't you know it, that lovely broken toilet seat jumped up and grabbed a handful of my super white stretch marked covered upper thigh and pinched the fire out if it! I was yelping, screaming and hollering all at the same time! That just about pushed me right over the edge when I heard Matt yell out, "Nice! It got me yesterday!" Ha! I sat there and just laughed! After getting over myself and my bummer attitude I admired my eyebrow that does seem to be growing back some and laughed some more. I exited the bathroom with a new outlook and attitude! Apparently I had needed a reset. I had allowed several insignificant events to spiral me in the Whineville. No matter what is "planned" there are some days that just go well and some that will just bite you on the ass!

Out the mouth of Ry!

Early in the week Ryder was watching Like Mike on TV. It's a cute little movie about an orphan that finds a pair of Michael Jordan's shoes that were hit by lightening. When he wears them he plays basketball, "like Mike". Ryder was mesmorized by the movie. I am not even sure he blinked. Afterwards he got my keys and told me we needed to go get him "some tricky shoes". I finally figured out he was asking me to find him shoes like in the movies. Every day since he has asked over and over for them. He is dead serious and wants to FLY! Sunday Matt is going to take him to find some. No harm in feeding that imagination! I guess we will just have to make sure he doesn't get disappointed.

I was dropping him off for school and I asked if we needed to blow his nose. His reply to me, "No. My burgers are gone and nothing is melting right now!" For the rest of my life when I get a runny nose I will think of that!

I was sitting at my desk and my foot was twisted to the side. He was sitting on the floor right by me and yelled, "GROSS!" I figured it was something the dog or the baby did. Nope! He was pointing to MY feet! My heel to be specific. I laughed and laughed. I really love flip flops but they don't love me and frankly my feet are gross!

This morning he woke up at 6:30. I was ignoring him hoping he would go back to sleep (of course he was in my bed). He grabbed my face and held it with both hands. He announced in a growl, "Mom! Did you forget to feed me dinner yesterday?". I guess he was hungry. I told him I had made him dinner but he chose not to eat it. He said to me, "That wasn't real food. I needed a real dinner".

Player #11 please step forward!

The last few days have been a whirlwind! This was the first week of school. Due to weather and construction delays everyone started at different times. In the midst Abbi was finishing up high school volleyball tryouts. That experience proved to be one of the most emotional of my mothering. Multitudes of girls wanted it so badly and were all giving their very best. I watched only for a few minutes, literally 2-3, before crying! The drive, stamina and drive was astounding! I knew she had put her very best forward but nonetheless was nervous and afraid for her. I have been on the other side of "not making it" and wouldn't wish that on anyone. In the end she did make the team and it's been very exciting to hear all that will be involved. Mostly I am just glad that part is over. I literally was having nightmares and stomach cramps. I am so incredibly moved by the person my little girl proved to be in the process. It gives me a lump in my throat. There is nothing more in my life that moves me than seeing someone reach their potential!